Amazing...isn't it?

In Ephesians 2:8-9, it state it was purely by grace, by the amazing grace of God, we are called into the kingdom of God, and finally to understand God's grace, is not to earn it, but to response to the grace that was shown.

We have received grace so that we can response to God in his grace...if God's grace could be earn in any sense, then God's grace would not be grace...Thank you for the amazing grace, the lesson learnt during my dad's wake...painful, but needful and grateful for what has happen as i recall the whole journey, it was grace, that we know of a God so high that is found at the cross. Amazing! Unbelievable! Shocking yet so simple.

Thank you, O Lord that i do not need to do anything more to earn your grace especially in times of studying, so many backlogs, the readings is definitely beyond me, the essays it seems never ending...but it was this grace, that my heart response in grace and not taking God's grace for granted. Momentum is the still the word in this season, to have the consistency in all that i do, teach me O Lord, to response in God's grace and not taking God's grace for granted, O Lord!

William Wilberforce, an English that fought against the use of African slavery during his time. It was this movie that struck my heart and the meaning of grace. Brought up as a boy, taught by John Newton - a priest (i think), who wrote the amazing grace that we all know of! a song of sheer grace by God, if not for this, no one could stand in the presence of God and let alone enter his kingdom. Wilberforce, a man who is very sharp with his words, passionate about one thing - to fight against slavery, one who challenge the imperial courts to lift up the rights of slavery that the English and French are enjoying. Many African died on their way due to the conditions of the ship where ladies are rapes for the pleasure of man, where no medicine was given, the sick and weak are thrown overboard, a real test of survival in a place where man could not survive.

Wilberforce, felt the sense of calling to do what God's will for him as he sees vision of people trapped in chains, pleading for mercy and restoration of freedom! He fought countless times, each time with stronger and sharper points to free the man of Africa, but each time he lost badly. badly he came down, harder each time, more pain than the one fall earlier. In the movie, "Amazing grace", i do not know how true it is, but he had a wife that fuels his passion, a woman that stood by him when all chips are gone, a word from the wise lady, go for it, Wilberforce. It did great lifting for him, to know that his wife knows his calling, his passion, believe in what he would die for.

because of this, the rest is history, it was definitely a defining moment for him, to sleep in peace. Few would know of his history and what he did, a man who is passionate about the word - freedom. only when one understood the word - grace, would know the word - freedom! this inspire John Newton, a man would understood the meaning of these words in its totality as he wrote the inspiration song, Amazing Grace.

Christ's death on the cross, was full of grace and yet it was where all believers found freedom in this grace, no longer bound by the Law, but all the chains of Law was totally fulfill by the blood of Christ.

Amazing... Isn't it?

Chosen, Blessed, Brokenness...

As i finished preparing the sessions, i thought that it was shallow, lack of depth in terms of not going deep into the word of God. and what was surprising for me, where is Christ as i prepare on the life of David. i was shocked, surprised that i did not talk anything about Christ. i realized that it was so possible and true to prepare a seemingly Christian session without talking about Christ at all. for 2 years ago, i remember a mentor who teach me the word of God then, i prepared my message, then i present it to him. He challenges me gently, "Who is the center of your message? Where is Christ in your message?"

I was totally speechless, and it was there, i had the conviction to preach Christ in all my messages, which i think it is a must, so that i would be faithful to the word of God in its totality. For the OT points us to Christ while the NT is the fulfillment of Christ. And because of this, i thank you, O Lord that you gave me the wisdom and conviction to preach Christ at all cost.

as for the messages, i believe that it was not that shallow after all, as i m still learning the lessons that i shared, and it is simply amazing!

nuggets...

• God knows what you are going through, God asked you to be faithful.
  
• A blessed man who is one who recount blessings and act in faith in the faithfulness of God.
• Chosen yet broken for the kingdom of God, to be used for the kingdom of God and to preach the kingdom of God.
• Remember how blessed i am through the companions i have especially in times of need.
  

Momentum...

I went for a cycle this evening, was a great time, chasing after bikers at East Coast Park, going at a top speed which i love the most when the wind blows at my face. What freedom! Gaining momentum to be at a constant speed to race with other bikers, friendly racing, catching up with each other, speeding off and changing gears remain the key moment that define the momentum. Learning to lap over each other without causing anyone injure is called Skill! =). I like~

One thing that i learnt from cycling tonight and throughout this season of mourning, which is to gain momentum, learning to cope with the death of my loved one. Learning to take one day at a time, but more importantly, each day is a surrender to God. Each day remind me of God's faithfulness. Each day has a new meaning for me. Each moment is a choice of surrendering.

I need to gain momentum for both spiritually and physically, learning to cope with this death. Even in these time of pain and lost, waking up in the middle of the night one night, realized that i am in tears, acknowledging that i miss my dad. What's new right?! =).

Momentum, what a word. O Lord, grant me the momentum i badly need for my studies, physically, emotionally and more importantly, spiritually. Grant me thy strength, wisdom, insights as i speak on Friday and Saturday for a youth camp. Let thy presence be felt through the preaching of Your word as You are the one who is speaking and not me. Let the cross be preached where love, compassion, grace and mercy is found through your living word through the life of David. Amen.

One life will soon past, but only what's done for Christ will last...

"One man's death inspire another to live."

Here I am, looking at my father for the last time in Singapore Casket. This is the very moment, reality sunk in right into my heart and mind as though it is in the deep blue sea. My heart is crying out loud, but there are only tears coming down from my cheek without any sound, for I fear that it would drive my family into tears uncontrollably.

Walking down to the car, where we walk a distance before taking the bus to Mandai, I spend a great time of thinking and reflecting, what my dad meant to me. I knew him incomplete, and how this incompleteness leave my heart wanting to yearn more and more time with him. I wish I could had spend more time with him, I wish I could do this, I wish I could do that. For a while, "I wish" list began to be so long, that I began to question myself, Why would you wish so many things, while you have all eternity to worship God together with your dad, will it not be the greatest thing that happen?

Surrendering was never easy, it is a great struggle for me, to sing the song, "Amazing Grace" for the last time before he was pushed into the furnace of fire. What greatness of grace and mercy that man could come before the Lord. What irrestible grace, what amazing love, what wonderful mercy, what perfect King and Creator of the earth! What God! Yet there is another part of me, surrendering...surrendering my father to God, if there is any phrase would describe it, it would be, "Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani?" I believe it is same pain when Jesus Christ at his last breath on the cross, he who bears the sins of man, yet being obedient to God the Father, what obedience and humbleness of Christ. Yet he need to feel the pain of not being with God the Father for that moment. The pain, the anguish, the Savior of the world, felt in sharp pain, this is my heart cry of pain.

Therefore, does God the Father know the pain of all humanity - especially when our loved one move on, He knows and understand. Is Christianity therefore relevant? Absolutely yes in this pluralism world - where everything has lost its center of truth.

One man's death inspire another to live. The night when man returns to ashes, I went out and reflect. Thinking the meaning of life, the value of a man's life, the quality of a man's life, and at the same time, thinking and reflecting what 2 Timothy 4:7, "I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith." This is what I have chosen for his inscription. Guess it is not so much for my dad, but it is more for me I suppose when I choose this verse.

A reminder to me, to preserve in all hardships, all of man's struggles and trials given by the Lord Jesus Christ. Looking at my dad's life, to hear that he was a pastor in younger days blow my mind away! WHAT! I could not believe it! No way! I was in denial when two pastors from the AOG came and told me, this truth was confirmed by my mum and elder brother. All of them knew, but I was totally in shocked for I did not know the truth! A reminder, a verse, a calling verse i suppose, a verse that challenge my mindset of life, fight, race and faith.

A commitment, a calling, a life surrender to his Kingship, his Lordship, his Sovereignty will through this challenging words of Paul.

One life will soon past, but only what's done for Christ will last...